Before We Go Any Further... A Proper Introduction

I have been publishing for a few weeks now and I have not properly introduced myself.

Typical.

I jumped straight into the writing because honestly that is how this whole thing started. On February 2nd, I had a simple idea to share what had been sitting in my notes app with the world. Before I knew it there was a logo, a custom domain, and a series. Then another series. I have been moving at a pace that did not leave room for introductions.

So. Better late than never.

My name is Kemi Sulaimon and this is Returning to God’s Heart.

Let me tell you honestly how I got here.

I grew up with church on both sides. My mother is Catholic. My father attends the Celestial Church of Christ. I moved through the Catholic church, Nigerian Pentecostal churches, Redeemed, Hillsong, and various non-denominational spaces across the UK and the US. I’m Nigerian, and Nigeria and church are practically the same word, so even my digital world has always been saturated with Christian content.

What I accumulated across all of that was technique. Steps. Processes. Formulas for getting God to move.

In 2016, I used every single one of them to get God to do something I desperately needed Him to do.

He didn’t move.

I did not stop calling myself a Christian. But I stopped caring about God. Not dramatically. Just quietly, the way you stop caring about a relationship that keeps disappointing you.

Fast forward to 2024. I rededicated my life to the Lord and started over. I watched sermons. I tried the processes again. Some lacked depth. Some skipped the hard parts. Some gave me steps 1, 2, and 3 toward a closer walk with God and I would begin them and find myself working harder and harder to get near a God who kept saying He wanted to be my Father.

I had spent years of my life chasing after my earthly father’s approval. I was not going to spend the rest of it doing the same thing with God.

What changed everything was not a better technique. It was the Scripture itself. God, in His kindness, began opening my eyes to His Word in ways that bypassed every formula I had been handed. And slowly I began to understand why the practices had never worked the way I expected. They had been severed from relationship. I was performing for a God I did not actually know.

This newsletter exists because of what happened when I stopped performing and started reading.

Returning to God’s Heart is for people who are tired of technique. Who have been through enough church to know the language but suspect they have been missing something. Who want to know God, not just know about Him. Who need the practices to mean something again, or for the first time.

I am not writing from the other side of a completed journey. I am writing from the middle of one. Which means everything here has been tested in real life, not just studied in theory.

Here is where we are so far.

The first series, Foundations: Seeing God Clearly, is already underway. It is fourteen essays on the character of God. Not doctrine to memorize but a person to encounter. Each essay takes one aspect of who He is and asks what changes when we actually believe it.

We have covered five essays so far:

Part 1: When Illusions Fall, God Becomes Clear — how disillusionment with religious systems can be the doorway to actually seeing God. When the formulas stop working, we are forced to confront whether we know God or just know about Him.

Part 2: Learning to Trust a God Who Does Not Need Managing — why God refuses to be controlled by technique, and what happens to our faith when we stop trying.

Part 3: The Tassel I Carry — God’s command to remember as a spiritual discipline. How memory of His faithfulness shapes formation and resists despair.

Part 4: When God Names One and Shapes Another — two paths to faithfulness, both honored by God. Why slow formation is not failure and your pace is not a judgment on your faith.

Part 5: Lifted Up Love — the bronze serpent, the cross, and the God whose love rescues by facing what we would rather turn away from.

If you are just joining us, all five are published and waiting. Start at the beginning. The series builds. Tomorrow, we continue with Part 6: the true meaning of a land flowing with milk and honey. If you have ever heard that promise reduced to something purely spiritual and felt something in you resist, that essay is for you. The promise is more real than we have been told.

Every Wednesday, without fail, something new goes up.

I am glad you are here. Genuinely.

Kemi